Another week.

so. fuck me and call me sanchez. i forgave ariana. she forgave me. i really cant stay mad at anyone for a good long period of time, like the most i could hate anyone is a week. it takes to much energy to hate someone, and i rather keep the good times going with her than just forget them and call her a bitch, when i know shes not. i know she loves me deep down, she fucks up alot, yah i know. but that doesnt make her a bad person, she just is kinda different thats all, and people cant adapt to how she is and bug out on her and i dont want to be one of those people. so please dont message me saying how shes going to hurt me or how shes a bum or something like that, becuase i really wont listen to you, because you dont decide who i love and who i dont love.

So, i finally went to a show here in alberqurque and saw Norma Jean, and Haste the Day, and My children My bride, they were all fucking dope. Haste the day was the best. && the lead singer for My children My bride is the sexiest thing ive ever seen, which is really weird because he totally resembles zack, arianas ex, and i think zack is disgusting, i dont know i cant explain that one. It was really awesome and only costs twenty bucks, my arms are still sore from trying to push my way to the front. which i did push my way to the front, and touched the lead singer of norma jean, jyeah.

I juss dyed my hair back to brunette, i got tired of the teal fast, and fuckin faggots had teal in their hair and gave the color a bad name and made me look like a dumbass for having it in my hair. plus i kinda think im cuter as a brunette anyway. so it works out for the best.

i swear to bob, every guy ive met is taken! half the reason i was stoked to come here was for a new crop of doods, and they are all taken. haha. ridiculous. but i have met two guys who live in alberqurque who are fucking cute and nice, so im content with that, no actually im pretty fuckin stoked. :P nite.

Dear Arianna.

You seriously can never call me your little sister again, you can not call me a good friend, fuck dont even think of referring to me as your friend. You should act like you never even knew me. Please, because thats what im doing to you. I never thought someone, who claimed they cared for me so much, could fuck me over twice, for a guy. I stuck with you through a lot of shit, when everyone hated you and told me to get rid of you, i never did, i stuck up for you. When you had no friends at bethel, i was there kikin it with you, when i had better things to do dam sure. When any guy hurt you or broke your heart, i was right there to help you through it, to call them a dick and help you get over it. When you had no where to go, i let you live at my house. When you had no shoes i let you keep a pair. You are so selfish, you only care about your self, and its a fucking lie when you say i love you jessie, its a fucking lie. Your seriously going to abandon our plans and our friendship over david, fucking david slaughter, what has he done for you? i hope hes fucking amazing, hes gotta be for you to be this fucked up. and when he breaks your heart, or when your life goes to shit AGAIN do not come to me, do not ask me for any fucking favor at all. because thats what you do, when you need something thats when you come to me. youve made me cry twice, and im not every crying over your dumbass again, your not worth it. have a good life dood, i hope you know what your doing choosing david over me.

on my own basically.

For some reason, i thought everyone would be as bummed as me about me moving down here. all the i miss you's and come back now's just dont seem to have any heart in them anymore, it feels like people are saying that just because they know they should, its the good thing to do, to help me out and make me feel like i am somewhat loved. I mean but who is really bummed? I cant think of one person who would be devastated like me. Chelsea i know loves me with all her heart, but shes happy, she has her boyfriend matt and her beauty school starting, seans got melody and all his friends, virgils got a whole new entire batch of friends, arianna has david, i mean basically everyones happy, but me. But ive decided to forgive arianna, if you know me, you know i can not hold a grudge worth shit. & im trying to talk to conrad again, i just sent a message to him, just basically saying wassup? i just miss him as a friend, in no way am i trying anything sneaky, i mean come on how could i im in new mexico. when i used to talk to him, id try and make him feel guilty or flirt or something, anything. but this time its different, i just want the kid as a good friend, because we have similiar personalities, we'd be dope ass friends and i know that, i just wish he would just talk to me, i mean im not doing any harm.